How do I stop saying: “Umm,” “Uhh,” or “You Know?”

People often ask me, “How do I stop saying umm, uhh, or you know?” Using these filler words is extremely common. It is something that even the most seasoned speakers struggle with. Sometimes our minds work faster than we can get the words out. Those filler words are what pops out when we are trying to keep up with our “turbo” brains.  Here are three techniques (I call them “the 3 P’s” of public speaking) I teach my clients to help them with this very normal problem. 

Pause!

First, it’s simple: just pause! Every time you feel yourself reaching for a filler word, make the intentional act to stop yourself and take a pause. This is hard to do informally, especially with someone you know well during a free-flowing casual conversation. However, when you are giving a talk, presentation, or speech, you are already in the mindful space to carefully choose your words. I highly recommend preparing for your talk using an outline and working with a speaker coach. Even if you find yourself having to give a talk on the spot without preparation, you can still be mindful of taking a purposeful pause instead of saying a filler word. 

Pacing!

Slow down! Public speaking isn’t race. Many people are so nervous speaking in public that they speed through a talk as fast as possible to get it over with! Doing that can be counterproductive and exacerbate the use of filler words. Even worse, it can make it more difficult for the audience to understand what you are saying. When you slow down, your mind and your mouth work together at the same speed and it is much easier to avoid using filler words. A speaker coach can help you determine the proper pacing for you so that the audience can digest every word of your speech. 

Practice!

Of course, even when you swap out filler words for a pause and get the pacing right, the most important aspect of public speaking is practice (and lots of it!). The more you practice your talk with good pacing and pauses, the less you will use filler words. I often tell my clients who claim they don’t have enough time to practice that they should rehearse their talk in their head during otherwise “dead time,” e.g., in the shower, driving, or during other alone time. Another great practice technique is to record yourself and play it back. This way you can hear how you sound and identify the times when you are using filler words.  

The next time you have to prepare for a talk, remind yourself of the 3 P’s: pause, pacing, and practice! I promise just using these 3 techniques will improve your public speaking. No matter what, don’t be too hard on yourself! One or two “umms” will not kill an otherwise incredible talk. As long as it’s not excessive, most people won’t even notice it!